When my single friends say that they are pumped about a guy but they don’t want to get too excited, I say eff that! No way! Get excited! Let your heart melt. Stare at that phone, wishing he’d text you. Giggle, smile, jump up and down! You’re in love and it’s fucking beautiful!
But… secretly, I get it. No one wants their heart broken.
My argument is, YES. You do. You absolutely want to fall in love and get your heart broken.
But here’s the thing… I did have a situation in my life that helped:
I fell in love so hard and so fast.
One day I might share the whirlwind romance that happened when my husband and I met and fell in love. But to spare you some time (and maybe some lunch… we’re too much) the extreme short story is, I fell in love right away. I was so excited all the time to just think about him.
That feeling. That wonderful flying feeling when you’re connecting with someone… your heart stops and pounds a million times a minute at the same time. You can’t breathe but it’s like you’re breathing for the very first time. You can point out every song that was written about true love. It’s like you’ve been reborn. It’s like, suddenly, you know who you are.
Love… or something like love… it’s a very rare feeling. You may have that feeling once in your life, if at all.
We all have been burned and it will hurt if it ends suddenly. But damn. It’s so much better to enjoy the time you have in this feeling than being blasé and so cool that you didn’t feel anything. Being so careful that you protect yourself is also so damaging! Pushing yourself away from the beauty of love and excitement can deny yourself of the real one true love of your life or any feeling at all!
If you’re feeling something that moves your body, something that lets your mind wander to the cheesiest depths of Lisa Frank magic, something that can’t define what is happening but you want to keep talking about it… live in it and enjoy it. When it ends, it may feel so devastating. But even that is the greatest feeling you might ever know.. .It the feeling that you still have dreams, hopes and desires.
When I met Stephen, my whole life changed. It was like I started blooming. I wanted to protect myself, but the feeling of just thinking about his smell or that I would see him soon was like electricity in my veins. The feeling was addicting. So I gave in to it and it was the best thing that I have ever done.
So, if you’re falling in love, don’t do that silly thing of protecting your heart. Get excited. You don’t know when you’ll feel this ever again.